(That’s my girl. She turned 10 this Friday!)
I’m up to my eyeballs in laundry when my almost ten-year-old
pops into the room. She’s been outside
jumping, running, and playing with her brothers while I whirl between cooking dinner
and the endless sorting and folding of clothes.
“I’m going to try to start calling you ‘Mom,’” she says,
“instead of ‘Mommy.’”
My heart lurches as though she’s announced a plan to move to
Australia in the morning, to join the circus, to fly far, far, away from
“Oh,” I say, casual as we mothers must be when feelings are
on the line, “why?”
I don’t remember her reasoning exactly, but in essence, it’s
time to put ‘Mommy’ aside. Then she hops onto the toilet, continuing our conversation with the door wide
“Remember when I told you to stop calling me ‘Mommy’?” I
“Yes!” she exclaims, “Why did you do that?!”
It was when we still lived on Franklin Street and she was
five, maybe six at most. I was
overwhelmed with All. The. Kids. we had so suddenly, so unexpected. In a fit of frustration one day I told her to
stop calling me Mommy and call me Mom instead.
She burst into tears at the thought and I immediately recognized I was a Truly Awful
Mother. Beginning to relent, I asked,
“Why is it so important to you?” Leaning in for a hug, with tears in her eyes,
she told me, “It just feels more comfortable.”
Even a Truly Awful Mother couldn’t argue with that.
Standing outside the bathroom I’m relieved she remembers the
incident, relieved for a chance to explain myself. “Oh Sophia,” I exclaim, “I
don’t know. I think I was just tired of
everyone needing me so much all the time.
I just wanted someone to need less of me.” “You have the Worst Mommy,” I add, grateful for a chance to take the blame.
She laughs and I do too.
* * * *
I’m super excited to be joining with Andi Cumbo-Floyd and Shawn Smucker to organize a weekend writer’s retreat this summer at God’s Whisper Farm in the beautiful mountains of Virginia. Visit Andi’s website for more info!
Welcome to the #SmallWonder link-up.
What if we chose to deliberately look for small moments of wonder, the small sparks of presence, of delight or sorrow, of true humanity in which we meet God?
That’s my proposal – that we gather here each week to share one moment of Wonder from each of our days. You’re invited to link-up a brief post about a small moment of wonder. Don’t worry if your post is too long, too short, or not just right – you’re welcome to come as you are.
While you’re here, please do take a look around and encourage at least one other blogger with a comment.